The quickest way to lose a business deal is to
The quickest way to lose a business deal is to make someone feel small. A buyer challenges your price. A partner pushes back on your plan.
An investor questions your logic.
Your instinct is to correct them.
You want to explain what they missed. You want to prove the point. You want to get the meeting back on track.
That is usually where you lose the room.
And once you lose the room, you usually lose the real objection too. They stop explaining. They start defending.
The truth you needed disappears.
Chris Voss, retired FBI negotiator and author of Never Split the Difference, gives a better line: “Seems like you have a reason for saying that.”
That sentence protects the other person’s status.
They do not feel attacked. They do not have to save face. They can tell you what is actually behind the objection.
Five signs your negotiation is slipping:
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You correct too fast. ↳ Ask what led them there first.
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You explain before you understand. ↳ Say, “Walk me through how you got there.”
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You treat pushback as resistance. ↳ Treat it as information you have not earned yet.
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You try to control the answer. ↳ Ask what would make the decision easier.
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You make disagreement personal. ↳ Keep the focus on their reasoning, not their identity.
The other line I’d steal from Voss:
“Is it a ridiculous idea if I share how I came to my evaluation?” That question lowers the temperature.
It gives the other person control. And it lets you share your view without making them defend theirs.
The buyer finally tells you the real objection. The partner says what they were worried about. The investor points to the gap they see.
The team member says the thing everyone else was avoiding.
Before you correct someone this week, ask one more question. You may find the issue was not disagreement.
It was that they did not feel safe telling you the truth.
video credit: thefbinegotiator
Repost for a friend who’s calling pushback resistance. Follow @BarryFlanagan to handle hard B2B conversations without losing the truth you need.